Starting a new romantic relationship can be really exciting but also a bit scary. You might feel nervous because you really like the person and want things to go well. But don’t worry, this is normal! Dating expert Andrea Syrtash says that when you start a new relationship, it’s a time to learn about your partner and yourself. Celebrity matchmaker Carmelia Ray adds that this early stage often feels like the start of falling in love. However, it’s also common to feel a bit anxious, which can put pressure on the relationship.
To help you avoid any problems, we asked experts for their top tips for people starting new relationships. Their goal is to help you enjoy this time without too much stress. Syrtash says that while long-term relationships need work, dating should be fun.
So, here are nine important things to remember when you’re starting a new relationship.
Keep the Past in the Past
When you’re starting a new relationship, it’s not a good idea to talk a lot about your past relationships, like what went wrong or what you’re afraid of happening again. People usually don’t want to hear about that, especially early on in the relationship. Instead, focus on the person you’re dating now and try to learn more about them.
Don’t Make Comparisons
According to Ray, comparing your relationship or partner to others is not good. Doing so can cause issues and make your partner feel upset. Instead, ask yourself these questions: Are you in this relationship just to compete with someone else? Are you trying to show off to others by being in this relationship? Or are you in the relationship because you truly like the person you’re dating?
Look at Actions More Than Words
Syrtash emphasizes focusing on what someone does now rather than just hearing about their future plans. This means actions show more than words. Conversely, if your partner introduces you to their family and friends, it probably means they see a future with you.
Be Vulnerable, Even If You’re Afraid
Ray explains that many people feel scared to reveal their true selves because it makes them feel exposed. However, in a new relationship, being vulnerable can strengthen your bond and build trust. Ray suggests that being open about your true self can be a gift to the person who wants to get to know you better.
Don’t Brag or Exaggerate
“Both men and women don’t like it when you constantly show off to your partner, especially if they already like you,” says the expert. You can be confident in yourself without listing all your achievements.
Stay in the Moment
In a new relationship, it’s important to remember that it’s a time for learning and exploration. “To reduce stress, remind yourself to stay focused on the present,” says Syrtash. This means being true to yourself and trusting your instincts. Even if someone seems perfect on paper, they might not be the right match for you in real life.
Avoid being overly clingy or needy
“A bit of jealousy is alright,” says Ray. “But if you’re asking your partner to spend all their time with you and give up things they liked before you dated, it’s a red flag.” It’s normal for new couples to spend time together, but avoid constantly texting, calling, or insisting on seeing your partner, as it can stress them out and push them away.
Don’t Give Up Time With Family or Friends
In a new relationship, couples often spend more time together and might even skip hanging out with friends. But it’s crucial to keep a balance. Ray advises, “Remember, some time apart can add to the excitement of seeing your partner.” If you keep canceling plans with friends for your new partner, it might seem like you don’t value your previous commitments. So, try to maintain your friendships and make time for them while managing your schedule wisely.