If someone suddenly disappears on you, don’t take it personally. It’s not about you; it’s about them. In fact, you might be better off without them! People who ghost their dates often have other negative qualities. So, count yourself lucky you don’t have to deal with any of those. Here are 10 common traits of people who ghost their dates.
They don’t have the balls to be honest
If someone can’t even send a simple text saying, “Sorry, I changed my mind,” then they probably struggle with honesty and taking responsibility for their actions. It’s not just about canceling dates; it’s about facing difficult situations in general. Do you really want to be with someone like that? I don’t think so. So, cheer up! It’s actually a blessing they ghosted you!
They don’t know what they want
I have a friend who often ghosts his dates, but surprisingly, he’s not a bad person. He’s actually really nice! The issue is, he’s just not sure about what he wants. We call him “lost boy” because he lacks direction in life. He’s indecisive and can’t commit to anything. Being with someone like him is tiring because you never feel secure. They’re always questioning things and searching for something better.
They’re people-pleasers
In simpler terms, when they seemed interested in you, it was mostly to make you happy. They asked you out on a date because they wanted you to feel wanted. But as the date gets closer, they start to back off. They realize they can’t go through with it for some reason… and that reason is they were only doing it to make you happy, nothing more! In the end, their attempt to please you ends up hurting you instead. You want someone who means what they say and follows through, not someone who just tries to please everyone. If you get married, how can you be sure they’re truly happy with everything? What if they’re just pretending to be happy to please you?
They’re a self-serving egoist
In simpler terms, they’re the type of person who only cares about themselves and doesn’t think about how their actions affect others. They like getting things for free, taking advantage of any opportunity, and pursuing as many people as possible. They cast a wide net and then decide who they want to be with. They probably asked you out just to have options, and they chose someone else. These people have narcissistic tendencies, and being in a relationship with them is not a good idea!
They’re wishy-washy
They’re the type of person who struggles to make decisions and stick to them. Give them time in a store, and they’ll spend ages picking things up and then putting them back. Ask them what they want for lunch, and their answer keeps changing. If you’re okay with this, that’s fine. But if it drives you crazy, maybe it’s a good thing they ghosted you.
They’re avoidant
Did you know about avoidant personality disorder? It’s when someone avoids situations where they might face rejection or criticism. This could affect their dating life and other areas too. They might avoid taking risks because they’re afraid of not succeeding. Personally, I couldn’t date someone like this. I had an ex who was scared to pursue his passions, move to another city, and even meet my family. It didn’t work out for us. If you can’t handle someone like this, it’s good they showed their true colors early on.
They find it hard to say “no”
Perhaps you were the one who asked them out on the date. They might have said “yes” because they find it hard to say no. Some people are just too nice. They might have hoped that you would change your mind, or that they would start to like you more as time passed, but it didn’t happen. People who struggle to say no gracefully won’t make good partners. You might end up being the one who has to say no to the people they said yes to, from pushy salespeople to family members asking for money. Don’t date someone who always says yes. Date someone who knows what they want and isn’t afraid to say it.
They don’t want to be seen as the bad guy
Many people who ghost their dates are actually trying to be “too nice”. They want others to see them as kind, sweet, and generous. Maybe they knew they didn’t like you from the start, but they put off telling you. Why? They might have hoped you would cancel the date instead. That way, they still seem like the good person. But trying to be so nice can end up hurting others more in the end.
They lack integrity
Can you trust them? Probably not. People with integrity would never skip a date without explanation. Even if it’s uncomfortable, they’d send a message explaining why. But those who ghost their dates are usually unreliable in many things. They might be like the colleague who’s always late with work or the friend who never shows up when you need them.
They expect others to always understand them
They’re not worth your time if they brush off ghosting you like it’s no big deal. They’re irresponsible and feel entitled. They think they can do anything wrong and get away with it, expecting forgiveness. They minimize their mistakes and lack empathy, only caring about themselves. They might even be narcissists who manipulate others. If they act like nothing happened and ask for another chance, it’s best to run the other way.